Is a bitch! I mean really, I don’t start the day with my usual yoghurt and frozen fruit shake anymore. Nowadays I prefer Xanax after I wake up. It’s driving me crazy, the constant hyperventilating and panic attacks. I seem to be completely preoccupied with the thought of dying, alone. Being eaten by my cat. It just flashes up in my thoughts, and wham, panic attack again. And instead of doing breathing exercises I prefer some pills. Works faster. Well at least that is what I tell myself.
It’s weird I always get attacks as soon as my life is in the shits. When all is good, no panic attacks at all. But then I lose my job, my man and my cat, and there I go again. I desperately need to relax, and I prefer a sauna and a good hard massage. Good for my sore muscles too; bootcamp the day after kickboxing is too much, I found out, the painful way.