Preparing for a hell of ride

So, as you might have noticed, I was slipping further and further into this depression (Wait, what? You’re kidding me right, I thought you were feeling waaaay better lol), my therapist and I decided we should be getting back on the good old meds again. 5 mg of Lexapro, took that before and, as opposed to the Zoloft I took once, it didn’t gave me these weird thoughts whenever I saw a tree, a speeding car or a train. Or a bottle of pills.

Now 10 mg is the usual start-up dose, but as I am very small and very very med sensitive, I started at 5. Sick as a dog for a week, hot flashes, sweating, fog in my head, and sometimes so high I felt (and looked I guess) like I was speeding my brains out on a shitload of coke. So this time, after staring at that little pill, cut in half (they only come in 10 mg) all morning, I decided to take it slow and start at 2.5. Took a knife and cut it down. Now it has been half an hour since I took that tiny little crumb, and I can already feel it, my legs are getting hot, my mouth is dry, I’m dizzy and I can feel the fog in my head coming up.

Will see what happens as the day goes by, and if I feel good I will take the next 2.5 in the afternoon. After all, I can’t feel much worse than I did the last couple of days.

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